Tuesday, May 1, 2012

On Being Special

I want to know that I am known
Valuable and valued

Foundational meanings of special are:
 "to receive unusual treatment"
"to be distinctive and unique"
(unless you are the in quotation marks, "special")

Do I need to be loved more than others
in order to feel good about myself?
Do I need to judge others as less
and myself as more
in order to feel valuable?

Why, the desire for attention?
Why sometimes an insecurity and/or jealousy
when someone else
is noticed and acknowledged
for having a gift or ability
When I am not?

"Don't forget about me"
"Remember I'm special and lovable, too"

We start as children
"Mommy, look at me, look at me!"
"Watch me now, watch me now!"
Seeking special notice;
Wanting to know we are noticed

And, if we are loved by our parents
we rightly receive this
Love notices and delights
in the beloved

Children look outside of self
To learn who they are

A healthy, mature adult
Will have learned to love and value self
Irrespective of attitudes and 
behaviors of others

I certainly don't want another 
to be loved less
So that I can be loved more
Yet, at times,
My emotional responses
Seem to indicate just that

Is it either or?
Is there a limited supply
of love and attention
value and respect?

The smaller answer is "yes"
People tend to notice the ones at the top
or the ones at the bottom
Whoever is more easily noticed
Whoever stands out from the crowd

The bigger answer is "No".
Our Source is Love
Limitless love

This Divine light
The seed of who we are
Lives within each of us
Connecting us to the eternal
Never ending flow
Of the life and love we desire

Awareness and connection
A heart to receive
and trust
Are keys to being filled 
To overflowing
With knowledge of value
With the confidence of 
The beloved

It is a knowledge
Not easily attained
But, worth any price
True life is here

When I rest in Love
When love flows from me
To others
All is good
All is beautiful
I see and delight
In everyone as beautiful and beloved.

This is the beginning of a conversation; 
a journey through the layers of finding value and beauty within Self